I made my Mom sad...

Sigh...

My mom just SMSed me to tell me that I made her very sad. I took a harsh tone when speaking with her just now.

She's on her way to the airport, flying to China for a short holiday...Shanghai and Beijing.

Anyway, she said that there were so many times that she felt sad when I spoke harshly to her, but today, she couldn't take it anymore, and decided to to tell me (albeit via SMS). I also don't know what to say...I mean I was really frustrated when I found out that she gave me unclear instructions and caused me to confuse my grandfather. Especially when one is dealing with the elderly and money matters, one must always be clear...if not will cause misunderstandings you know. When she proceeded to insist that she did not instruct me wrongly, that infuriated me even more. I read out every single SMS she sent me regarding the issue, and she realised that she was wrong, but she still said,

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Mom: "Even if I really was wrong, you did not have to speak to me so harshly you know? You know how many times you spoke to me harshly, and I felt sad, but I never said anything?"

XJ: "Haiz..." (she cuts me off)

Mom: "So next time I should tell you straight to your face immediately right?"

XJ: "Yeaaah...but I just get very frustrated when you are not clear about instructions..."

Mom: "Forget it...I don't want to talk about it anymore...byebye."
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That was the conversation can?! I also don't know whether I handled that well...

Feeling shitty now...

She really should be more frank with me...but then again, I'm not totally frank with her also...so I guess I can't really say anything right?

I still stand by this mantra:

THINGS THAT ARE LEFT UNSAID PROBLEMATISE ALL RELATIONSHIPS

I honestly think this is very true...ALL relationships...

The tough part is finding that someone that you can be truly TRUTHFUL and FRANK to...not easy to trust a person so wholly. I'm glad I have a few friends with whom I can be totally truthful and frank. Thanks guys. ^_^

Until then, a piece of advice to everyone reading this, don't leave too many things unsaid ok? They will come and bite you in the butt...I guarantee it. And when they do, its neither pretty nor painless.

Sigh, now I'm unhappy, and my Mom is unhappy too...both unhappy...sianz...

I don't like making my Mom unhappy...sucks.